Falkirk man assaulted with a potato masher

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Local residents of Falkirk have been left bemused after local pensioner named as Brian Rooney was assaulted repeatedly with a potato masher at his local pub. Mr Rooney a regular at local pub mash and bash was repeatedly struck over the head by the potato masher during an attempted theft of his guiness. During the ensuing struggling Mr Rooney recieved mashed like marks to his head. Mr Rooney has been praised by local police for his bravery and stated "That no man comes between him and his guinness" police are keen to speak to a white male 4 foot tall. Bald. No teeth with a left glass eye carrying a potato masher. Please call. Masher basher on 678 678 with any ifo

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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