Burntisland man dined at local buffet without paying, then boasts about it on social media.

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(The Fife Free Press, Sergio Leone)

A Burntisland man, who wasted £607 worth of food at a local buffet last Saturday evening without paying is due to appear in court.

Michael Douglas (23) of Burntisland, Fife, commonly referred to as 'Mike Situation', dined at the Beijing Banquet himself in Glenrothes last Saturday evening.

A waiter from the establishment who wants to remain anonymous gave his account of the ordeal:
"We have had a few disrespectful customers in the past but this was truly appalling. As soon as he woddled through the entrance he clicked his fingers at us, and shouted bring me a fucking wok full of chinky food to my throne in the corner."

It was reported that Michael briefly sat down at a table before walking to the serving counters (revealing a part of body his body at a bemused onlooker in the process), where he then proceeded to place his round hands in and out of 17 trays of food before a member of staff was asked to call the police urgently.

During this moment, Michael made a run for the exit, bulldozing several members of staff who tried to restrain him. Before walking out the entrance, Michael slowly pivoted around towards the staff one final time, where he shouted and declared himself the buffet king.

One hour after the scene, Michael had posted a boastful and disgustingly racist paragraph on his Facebook account - "There isn't a man born from his maw that can conquer the boofee king. Now that we Britain has left the EU euro al go intae these gaffs and do what a want. We havny got euro laws nomore so there's nothing China can do when a choir fae them. Peev on tonight wi Steve, wee baz Claire and Craig who's coming down?."

More on this story to follow.

Published: 16:02, 28th October.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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