Four Cook County Teenagers and a Group of Trash Pandas Charged with Treason

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On the evening of October 29th, local Downers Grove resident Chang Sun Lee reported what seemed to be a small group of Trash Pandas entering the haunted Bachelors Grove cemetery after hours. It has been recently confirmed that Lee was also high on meth during this time. The group of Trash Pandas, along with 4 teens from Riverside Brookfield High School, entered the cemetery at approximately 9:15 p.m. Downers Grove Police officer Marion Moseby arrived on the scene and seized the car of one of the Riverside-Brookfield students. The four teens and group of Trash Pandas were spotted by officer Moseby exiting the cemetery at approximately 9:44 p.m. and cooperatively engaged with officer Moseby. The group of Trash Pandas did not comply and soon escaped into the woods, never to be seen again. The four high school students were faced with a $35,000 ticket for treason, a $75 charge for harassment of an officer using racial slurs, and an additional $35 charge for trespassing and violating curfew. We have also recently confirmed that the teen, who is also the owner of the car, abruptly asked officer Moseby to use the "porta-john" during the time of the sieze. Minors, be safe this Halloween!

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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