Boy, 17, of Mersey Road, Redcar, wins Mandingo competition

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A boy, locallly knows as DTones, recently competed in the international Mandingo competition. DTones currently lives at 11 Mersey Road along with his mother, father, younger sister, girlfriend and several cats. DTones travelled alone to the competition, held in Moscow. Originally, the penis-orientated competition was supposed to be held in the country of origin, Sierra Leone. However, due to the Ebola virus, the competition had to be moved to Russia.
"DTones" departed Redcar on September 19th and returned on October 7th. He reached the final against a Colombian competitor as well as a Nigerian. DTones managed to win the judges over and get voted as number 1. In an interview, we asked DTones about the experience and how it has impacted on his life. "Well", grinning, "in my experience, Moscow was a different box of frogs. It was a tad wild but it suited my character. The other competitors were all sound as fuck. I even pulled a bong with one of them; his name was Pablo. Winning such a prestigious competition has allowed me to realise my potential and open doors to other opportunities".
Although the competition seemed very fun, DTones has admitted that it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. "Leaving my girlfriend was hard. Spending that length of time away from the person I love is difficult. To pass the time I just listened to some MC Stompin - that took my mind off things".
Missing his girlfriend was a task but he has admitted that there was a second problem that he had to deal with.
"Well, as you know I have many cats. Not seeing their furry little faces everyday does pull on your heart strings. Anyhow, I'm off to celebrate with the boys and buy an ounce".
We hope to catch up with him in the future. A Redcar celebrity, but more so, - TS10 hero.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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