Local man caught playing salami sword fighter in Walmart.

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Today in a Butler county Walmart a local man 23 year old Michael Fleeger was arrested. His charges are attempting to rob several individuals for small amounts of change and one count of indecent exposure. The assailant pulled out his "wiener" and began swinging it at people. At one point he said he needed all the change he could get to help get him some "D.T.B" (dirt track booty). Once police arrived the suspect still had his wiener out and was attempting to start a "salami sword fight" contest. He was shot with a taser and taken to a local hospital for treatment. One of the barbs fro the officers taser struck the suspect in the wiener and he suffered second degree burns to it. He is expected to recover. He will be transferred to Butler country jail and await trial.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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