G-Uber behind Harambe scandal shooting
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As it turns out, G-Uber has been plotting for sever years to get rid of Harambe the gorilla. With struggling stock prices plummeting and ride sharing prices going down, G-Uber was afraid Harambe would ultimately lead to the company's derailment. News sources such as NY TIMES and TIMES learned that Harambe the gorilla was in private negotiations with LIFT, one of G-Uber's top rivals in ride sharing. LIFT had reached a multi-million dollar deal with Harambe and promised a 10 year deal that would guarantee free bananas and free rides for the gorilla. The day of the shooting, sources reported seeing a G-Uber employee was seen with a rifle hiding behind one of the bushes. Although the media reported authorities attempting to shoot the gorilla, it was not until later that authorities discovered the bullet came from an unknown source when the gorillas body was removed. A witness who remains unknown claims that she saw a man with a rifle running into an G-Uber marked vehicle with the U emblem sticker at the time of the shooting. As of today, the Harambe shooting remains a controversy.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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