HERPES CURED BY BULL MILK!

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

2059 84408 Shares

Friday December 9th a man, Craig Ethan Bonar walked into an STD Health Clinic in Jackson County exclaiming, "I've found the cure!"
It seems that Mr. Bonar had been battling these awful facial blisters around his lips for some time after interacting with a transgender prostitute on Independence Avenue. When asked if he regretted the incident he declined stating "it was a truckers D-Lite" and he'll do it again now that he knows he can live outbreak free in the future.
Recently he was on the family farm and his mom who cares for several heard of cattle asked her son to go fetch fresh milk for supper. While on his way his brother stated there was a big one {cow} their father had been unable to milk for some time now and made a wager that he'd be unsuccessful as well at an attempt. Being the gambling man he is he quickly accepted his offer and ran on down the field after her. He soon realized exactly why his father had been unable to extract the desired milk...-this cow was different, and obviously shy given its visual deformity.
It had horns and only one utter but he was determined! The moment he grabbed for the single utter the cow came alive and Mr. Bonar almost albeit hooked by this strange cows deformation and the bucket was kicked out of his hand immediately so he did the next best thing and grabbed the two round handles he assumed were protrusions of what should have been the rest of the utters and took a mouthful each time back to the bucket.
There was but one problem, the fluid was thick and rich, quite tasty actually as put by Mr. Bonar and so much so that he found swallowing to be involuntary and impossible to retain until he returned to the bucket never making back to the house with any.
When he returned his mother screamed stop her lungs and said, "Craig! Where have you been...my goodness it's gone!" He said, "I know mother and I'm sorry." She said, "It's okay son it was only 1 transvestite lot lizard but your rice lipped crispys are gone!!!" He was excited and pleased all at the same time knowing mom wasn't mad and he succeeded at making that odd critter while also giving hope to those who suffer as he did. Trials will begin January 2017.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

loading Biewty

Most Popular

  1. 1

    bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.

  2. 2

    new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."

  3. 3

    whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.

  4. 4

    two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri. While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.