Local Vagend (Vag Legend) James McGee Found Picking Up Milfs Via Minecraft Online

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

2059 66509 Shares

Breaking news is being reported right now as we have just received intel that James McGee, the world renowned Knight of Vagina, is back at it again.

Unlike most reports regarding the sexual prowess of our beloved Ass Master McGee, this one is quite beyond what we would expect from the Knight of Vag. His skill and finesse in the vaginary arts have doubled since we last reported.

Normally, you could catch Ass Master McGee down at the local day care picking up woman during his daily home-wreck shift, but today, he had better cookies to crumble. In absolute disregard to the normal sexual boundaries of online behavior, James McGee has smashed yet another barrier in what seems to be a revelation of true seductive potential. Jumping from one venue to the next, he surely slays a Vag or two along the way.

The new format of Ass Master McGee's domination has been manifested in the Xbox Live Children's game: Minecraft. When interviewed about why he chose a video game as his desired venue for setting the "vaginal hook" , as he likes to call it, he was very kind and genuine with us regarding our vaginal arrogance. He had told us warmly, "You see, when your world is centered around the Vaginal Arts, you can learn and perceive all different types of routes that will lead you to pound town. Like a mouse finds the cheese, I find the boots and knock the absolute shit out of them." When asked how one reaches such a rank of Vaginal Knowledge, he responded, "I look at my elevated perception like a 3-dimensional object. When you folks are trying to see what Im seeing, you're stuck in a 2-dimensional viewpoint. You just cant do what I do in your current form. "

James had first plotted his pathway to pound town when he was walking through Wal-Mart for his afternoon BBW, he had noticed a copy of Minecraft in the video game section. "I walked right past the game but in the corner of my eye I barely noticed what looked like a game rating of E-10+." That is the reference to the age rating of Everyone 10 and up for video games. "When this rating first revealed itself to me, I had ditched all plans for the BBW Barbecue I was going to slop up for lunch. I knew I had to use this game for my next triumph. Any kid who is 10-14 and is playing this game surely has a hot mom."

This is a very broad assumption, one we wouldn't even expect from our Ass Master. Nonetheless, if he says the sky is purple, then the sky is purple. I had to get further clarification on this statement of hot moms from James. He explained very patiently that, " The year is 2016, we have a very skewed memory of new moms from 2002-2006. We are not talking about moms who have had children once before 2002- This is all about those sexy new moms ranging from 20-28 years old. This gives you a birth window for these milfs dated back to 1974 all the way until 1982. If they were not born between 1974 and 1982 and didn't give birth between 2002 and 2006, Then they are not the correct candidate for the a mother of a minecraft child of ages 10-14. "

Wow- The only word that could possibly be uttered in the face of absolute Grandmastery of Vagina. His formula checked out in every way except for our testers attempt at closing the deal. After hot moms were located using this path, we found that the key to the promised land was held by only Ass Master McGee. He and he alone can push a grown mother to getting on the microphone to hand him the address for him to go to for his well deserved Fiesta of Vag.

"It all starts with just treating a young man and/or woman with respect. These children playing minecraft need not be prayed on, so I pray on the highest hanging fruit these children know- Their hot fucking mom. When I tell these kids they are important, they practically recommend me to their mom for a good fuck immediately. Most the time I only need to spit about 3 butter-like sentences and these milfs are already yelling the coordinates of their location, regardless of their husbands presence. I usually get along with the husband just fine, he cant watch or join, but he appreciates the Vaginal Liberation my presence has brought his family"

"When James gets on Minecraft, my wife is already wet! I used to get quite jealous at first, but when I accidentally walked in on James stirring my wife like pancake batter, I saw a look of eternal happiness in her eye, a look that would require a true monster to take away, like stripping a baby of its mother. I knew then that my Wife truly needed the Knight of Vag himself. I am forever grateful."

It's never been done before, and certainly wont happen again until James tells his sperm its okay to impregnate. Only the offspring of Ass Master McGee could replicate these results. He has shown us all once again what the true meaning of Vaginal Arts is- It's all about love- Regardless of the path taken, Ass Master McGee has shown us Poundtown can always be attained (By him).

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

loading Biewty

Most Popular

  1. 1

    bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.

  2. 2

    new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."

  3. 3

    whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.

  4. 4

    two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri. While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.