Solar Eclipse Cancelled
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Due to a mistake in the typically accurate Mayan calendar, missing pages in the Farmer's Almanac, and crooked Hillary's lost emails, the historic event of the up and coming August 21st Solar Eclipse has been cancelled. The Trump administration has released the following statement in regards to this event, "Media would have you believe that my administration built a wall around the eclipse. We all know this is FAKE NEWS! My team and I are working bigly with Russia to locate the lost eclipse. Once found, my son, Donald Trump Jr. will be personally investigating the location of our nasty woman's emails inside of the eclipse itself. Check Twitter often for updates on this situation. Do not worry, America. We will "make the sun great again!" Putin has stated, "It seems as though the great American Eclipse is a clear symbol of the current state of affairs. Instead of being eclipsed on one day, the cloud of darkness will forever hang over Trump's American Dream." Obama was quoted off the record texting, "The African American communities are unconcerned with this event due to the fact that niggas be black in the light and the dark bitches."
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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