How to slay an alligator with a butter knife:
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 97119 Shares
What do you bring when you visit African swamps? Guns? No you only need a butter knife. That is how a woman in Africa saved her and her children after a 500 pound alligator entered her home through an open door at there home by the swamp. The lady then using her kitchen skills slayed and killed the alligator using only the butter knife. And believe it or not witnesses of this brave act claimed she didn't even use the sharp side to begin with.
The lady now giving away her name Jennifer Laptishi describes how she slayed the alligator using only the butter knife she was chopping her kids veggies with. She says speed is the key. Just like a bullet speed is what makes anything lethal. If you tap a bullet to someone it won't hurt them. But if you fire at them at supersonic speeds yeah it will kill them possibly. So speed is key. She claims she swung the knife at the alligators eyes and brain giving it a serious concussion 10 minutes into the fight before the alligator died from serious brain injuries.
The woman is currently arrested and charged and serving 36 years behind bars for aggravated animal abuse of a reptile and attempted murder and the alligator has been proven to be in a coma and possibly even die. The woman is being placed of a $10,000 bail fee.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.
-
2
new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
-
3
whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
-
4
two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri. While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.