NFL to Replace National Anthem with Islamic Prayer Next Year.
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Well, Patriotic Americans, just when you thought the NFL couldn't get any worse with countless kneeling protests, firing back at President Trump when called out on what some would say "disrespectful tactics" among other angry chants, this just in straight from Commissioner Roger Goodell: Effective 2018 Football season, the NFL union, players, coaches, officials, and all other staff alike, have secretly passed a bill through the league agreeing to replace the National Anthem with Islamic prayer to begin future football games.
The bill, set to take place in the beginning of the 2018 preseason, was originally analyzed on behalf of former San Francisco quarterback Colin Kaepernick, who is currently a free agent due to allegedly becoming the first player to kneel during the National Anthem at the 49ers' third preseason football game last year. Kaepernick spoke to us in an interview about discussing the idea with Goodell and the board of directors and here is what he had to say, "The man who wrote the lyrics to the national anthem was a racist and we cannot continue this horrid trauma and pass this on to our children. They are our future." says Kaepernick. "People in this country are putting down a religion they fear because they don't understand it's true peaceful nature as they confuse the peacefulness of the religion itself with the false hatred a few bad apples bring to the table."
He also goes deeper about his conversation with the NFL Commissioner about what is so special about the Islamic Prayer and he also discusses the shame stemming from America's History and why it is time for a change. "Correct me if I am wrong but do we not have Freedom of Religion? Freedom of Expression? America has always been breeding grounds of the racism plague and the root of all racism evil. When I graduated college my celebration field trip was to the UAE and Saudi Arabia. I was very optimistic to have learned about how peaceful real Islam stood for and that it was not about what the uptight bigot Christian Conservative media groups throw in your face 24/7, a prime example would be Fox News, I cannot stand those racist morons. If I wanted to live in the past, I would invent a time machine and travel back to 1845 just to be a slave to the real Confederates just to show these modern Neo Confederate toothless rednecks why wishing to be in the past only brings negative energy. Roger (Goodell) sees where I am coming from about this issue and i am very satisfied to see many more players unite and carry my special movement and I hope to extend (protest) beyond the boundaries of Football let alone the NFL."
When the bill takes effect, Goodell also plans to permanently ban the American Flag, any clothes with any red, white, or blue, or the flag itself on them and most importantly of all, everyone in attendance of any NFL game from 2018 forward will strictly be required to participate in the Islamic prayer. Any violations of this matter will be punishable by sentencing to minimum of ten years in state or federal prison followed by court order to take classes on Muslim education and tolerance.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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