Davis loses World Series
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 44853 Shares
Gary Davis pitched a Textbook game tonight, Except, Jack Daniels must of Had the Answers to the test, Due to going 4 for 4 With 2 of the Hits Home Runs. Makes the total Home Runs Hit off Davis 36 In Daniels future hall of fame career, Daniels has had Davis number going back all the way to 6th grade when Davis hired Daniels to protect him against a Small, but tough Upper class 2grade girl Bernice Davis (no relation) with Davis's own father Cheering Daniels on, Put Davis on a one way track to self destruct hisself, Trying to hid his pain and embarrassment, with The Drug Marijuana, Which Davis again blaming Daniels for getting him hooked in 4th grade. When asked, Daniels quoted, Gary is a close dear friend, in fact, I Got Davis drunk for the first time, He has me to even thank because he lost his VIRGINTY at a Family Reunion back in 2015 thanks to Daniels giving him his sloppy seconds. That's true love, hooking him up with a old girlfriend (I gave her Crabs unknowing to her, He always had a thing for Bruce Jenner, growing up as kids Davis would often eat his cereal just steering, eyes wide open looking at how great Bruce's hair flowd in the wind. So when Bruce became a she, I just thought Davis would like to hook up with the Reality star, who's stage name is KATLIN JENNER. Davis and Jenner started off strong. But, Davis couldn't let it go, She was a hand me down from Daniels, From All the Drugs, Booze, hours waisted watching GAME OF THRONES, only to be outdone by Daniels again when Davis read in the National Enquire that Daniels had gotten the Queen pregnant. With Daniels Looking down the road as the future King, Davis had to Stay In a inpatient Rehab in Pittsburgh, Davis's Doctor, Dr. Dre from The University of Compton told Dan Rather of 60 minutes, I just wished Davis would quit being a Pussy, And quit crying and do some PUSH-UPS. Nigger always crying, Daniels did this, Daniels did that. I don't understand, I Kno Daniels. He's a cool motha Fucka. There's always a Hater! Daniels chooses to turn the other cheek buy, paying off the house owned by Davis mother if Springdale. Daniels no stranger to the Davis family, Davis's Dad, Big Fred Davis told the Morning News of Springdale, Daniels. He's like a son in my eyes Davis quoted, the first time he hit a homerun off my son Daniels, signed the ball he hit on top of the roof of the nursing home with a estimate distance 239ft. A stroke for a 7 yr old. When handed to ball Daniels to Daddy Fred, someday this will be worth millions, Davis quoted it's priceless in my heart. Not knowing years later Davis's son Gary, would always be linked to a stat sheet saying Davis goes belly up again Daniels going 4 for 5 with 3 home runs and a stand up Triple. The only other at batt Daniels didn't cross was in the fifth when Daniels crushed the ball back at Davis, who Screamd like a 8 yr old girl. Ducted covering his Blood Shot eyes some how caught the ball for the out, Fred, had to be escorted from the Park protesting the call. Davis, defeated and homeless. looked to get back on his feet from some help from his mom was horrified when Davis's own mother told Gary, I always thought he might be bisexual, which I loved him the same. But, it was comforting to have a Strong Male Looking out for Gary. Gary's own mom has been heard SCREAMING quit crying and do some PUSH-UPS.
Davis couldn't be reached for comment. He was busy waxing Daniels Lamborghini
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.
-
2
new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
-
3
whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
-
4
two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri. While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.