Moose OOO MY!!!

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Sources say that
increasing amount
of Mooses!!
By BOB O’BOBSTON
International Moose Count Underway
The UN-sponsored International
Moose Census got off to a flying
start today with hopes for an increase
in the worldwide moose population
compared to last year’s disapointing
figures. Among the traditional
early reporters were Egypt,
returning figures of six moose, a
twenty percent increase on 2011’s
figures of five, and Uruguay whose
moose population remains stable at
eleven. According to Robbie McRobson,
head of the UN Moose Preservation
Council, worldwide moose numbers
are expected to grow markedly
on last year due to the traditional
moose strongholds of Canada and the
United States, with the larger developing
moose ecologies also poised
to make gains. The largest percentagege
increase in moose will likely
come from China”, says McRobson,
The Chinese government has invested
heavily in moose infrastructure over
the past decade, and their committment
to macrofauna is beginning to
pay dividends”. Since 2004 China has
expanded moose pasture from 1.5
of arable land to nearly 3.648 and
moose numbers are expected to rise
to 60,000 making China a net moose
exporter for the first time. This is
good news for neighbouring Mongolia,
a barren moose-wasteland whose
inhabitents nonetheless have an insatiable
desire for the creatures. The
increase in Beijing-Ulanbataar trade
is anticipated to relieve pressure on
the relatively strained Russian suppliers,
but increase Mongolia’s imbalance
of trade with its larger neighbour.
Historically the only competitor
to China in the far eastern moose
markets has been Singapore but the
tiny island nation is set to report
a net loss, expecting a decrease of
more than five percent on last year’s
50,000 moose counted. The head
of Singapore’s Agency for Agriculture,
JingFeng Lau, explained to an
incredulous Singaporean parliament
yesterday that bad weather had contributed
to this season’s poor showing,
most notably when a cargo of 150
moose were swept out into the Indian
ocean in a monsoon. Yet again the
global demand for moose will be met
largely by the US and Canada. The
recession-hit States is taking comfort
in its moose growth figures with
gross production expected to break
700,000 and net exports to grow by
2. The worldwide dominance of
Canada shows no signs of abating
though with this year’s moose population
expected to match last year’s
record figures of one hundred million
billion. Europe’s rise as an international
moose power will slow slightly
this year as a response to the European
Union’s move towards standardising
the European moose. Stringent
quality controls are holding back the
development of the eastern european
populations compared to last year
when they contributed significantly
to europe’s strong growth figures.
Norway, which is not an EU member
but has observer status, strengthed
in numbers relative to the Euro area
with numbers of Norweigian moose,
known locally as elk” expected to rise
for the tenth consecutive year, particularly
thanks to a strong showing
in the last quarter. As moose season
reaches its close, researchers world
wide are turning to science in an attempt
to boost next year’s figures.
NASA stunned the scientific community
today with the announcment of
their discovery that the moon is significantly
smaller than previously believed.
This conclusion, which is the
conclusion of a tenyear collaborative
project, will have profound implications
for the moose community as the
gravitational field is now known to be
of the right strength to support moose
in orbit. Chris:tmas: Coming to an
END!!!! 11 DEC 2017 2 According
to John Johnson, head of the NASA
Moon Sizing Experiment the first delivery
of moose into low moon orbit
could be achieved as early as the third
quarter of next year. The technology
to nurture moose in space is available
now”, he said

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