Week 8 Power Rankings: Eventful week leaves brand new rankings
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What an exciting week for the worldwide fans of Park Ridge House League basketball. Raptors vs Cavs, Bulls vs. Celtics, Twolves vs. Pooicans, and the Nuggets won a game??? Stay Tuned.
Raptors vs. Cavs kicked off the wild day. To start off, I must say that the Cavs wanted to win so badly they told their worst two players the wrong location of the game, but enough of their bushleague BS. A quick 20 point lead out of the gates for the raptors made it look like they opened up a can of whoop ass on the sorry cavaliers, but they couldn't find the promise land in the end. Say what you want about the "Big three" but its clear that ivaylo tommy and marko are overrated garbage. These three combined for 9 points and surprisingly only one techincal foul. (On Ivaylo to no ones surprise) Declan Digan clearly paved the way scoring most of the points. However, basketball wasnt the exciting part of this game, it was moreso focused on beef. Rage Monster Tochev was seen in tears after the Cavs win due to an overage of beef. We must be nice to him as his feelings get hurt very easily. Cavs sneak by getting a lucky win.
Next was the Skinny Fucks vs the football Meatheads. (Better known as Bulls Celtics) Jonny Halvorsen lead these bulls to a great upset win. The Bulls key to the game was utilizing their big bodies and loud chirps. These Celtics SHIT the bed big time. I have never seen a group of kids so rattled in their lives. Declan Griffin of the Celtics was quoted this after the loss, "This is what happens when a bunch of skinny fucks play football meatheads." Skinny fucks indeed, Overrated celtics lose. Daddy is home.
A truly disgusting affair at 2:00. It seems the Blazers are truly garbage, disregard everything I said previously. It may look close but these guys suck. They lost to the Nuggets today. Thats pretty embarrassing, but both teams remain irrelevant.
next was Wizards Kings. Remember these Kings took last week off the pray for a win, but their prayers were not answered against the league beasts. Daly and Stoch are unstoppable. Nuff said, wizards win big and basically clinch the one spot.
Jazz vs. Suns followed. Not an exciting win, but the Jazz improve to a quiet little 6-1. Dont be fooled as their easy schedule and poop team wont take them to a championship run. Nontheless a boring ass game.
The finale was a good, but bad one. Two bad teams that ended in a buzzer beater 3. Twolves vs the sorry Pooicans. It was a nailbiter all day until Corcoran hit the game winning three to put the Twolves on top with just seconds remaining. Their name should say it all. U gotta be pretty poo to lose to the twovles... doesnt get much worse than that. However, these Twolves now have 4 wins!!! Gross!!! Amazing how a first round bye is still in contention for these fools. An ass beating next week against the Cavs next week is expected.
Next week is the last before playoffs.
MVP of the week: Danny Wolf
Power Rankings:
1) Wizards
2) Celtics
3) Jazz
4) Bulls
5) Raptors
6) Pooicans
7) 76ers
8) Twolves
9) Nuggets
10) Blazers
11) Suns
12) Kings
13) Sonics
14) Cavs
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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