Local Sailor saves Possum from death. "The Navy calls him a Hero!"
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A local man is being called a hero today after he saved a possum from drowning. The man, Darryl Davenport , told reporters that he saw a large possum struggling for air, and that he had to do something. "That sh*t was crazy man. What if that was me drowning. I think the possum would have reacted the same way," said Darryl. While responding to a call, Davenport spotted what looked liked a neighborhood pet, drowning in a pothole at the corner of Winchester & Ynez St...Darryl immediately parked his truck and took action. Witnesses say Davenport jumped out of his vehicle, reached into the pothole and grabbed the possum by the foot. Darryl immediately started giving CPR! "He was blowing air up the possum's butt...and I yelled out, "that's nasty!" But Davenport viciously replied "Maaann mind yo business, stay in yo lane!!"...so I DID, said one of the witnesses. When asked about blowing air up the possum's butt, Mr. Davenport told us he learned that trick from blowing air up his buddy Carter’s (Tee) butt when they were party hopping. "Tee almost died and everybody was like 'just blow air in his ass'...and I did it. Carter (Tee) is alive today!"
"I feel good about what I did today, but the possum urinated on my shirt when he woke up. You can see and smell it right here," said Davenport as he smiled for the cameras.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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