Trading Rae Dunn May Be An Early Sign of Dementia

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The popular pottery has become a currency of sort for middle class, suburban moms. But scientists say it may also be a sign they are losing their minds.

Doctor Dave David of Johns Hopkins says "The difference between the Rae Dunn addiction and other addictions is that it is doing damage to the brain. Smoking, for example, is addictive and harms the body as a whole, but trading Rae Dunn quite literally melts your brain." Dr. David quoted a recent study that showed, 100 percent of Dunners fight with their spouses about using, moving or selling Rae Dunn products.

David goes on "Even smokers will stop smoking when they smoke a cigarette. They will come back again for one but at least the last one is gone. Dunners keep on buying more and never get rid of it as fast as they buy it."

Some husbands even report that their wife is getting into arguments with long time friends just because they purchased a piece they wanted. Some husbands say their wives make them hold the mugs for ironic pictures to post on social media.

I interviewed a Dunner's husband about the problem. To protect retaliation he remains anonymous. "Why? Why does she need so many pieces? I never know which pieces I'm allowed to use. The ones used for decorating look the same as the ones I'm supposed to eat out of." He was clearly frustrated and went on, "Almost all of them are empty! There is nothing in them!"

Dr. David said that Dunners are starting to form their own communities. "They will meet people at HomeGoods and start talking about trading. They call them 'Dunn Buddies'" Dr. David said that this behavior will eventually devolve into "Dunn Villages" and "Dunn Cities" where only Dunners are allowed. They will operate on their own economies and probably use Rae Dunn products exclusively as their currency.

I asked Dr. David if there was any hope for the women. "The best advice I can give is to have an intervention and express your concerns with your wife about the issue and then sell all of it, because most men could probably retire with the money gained." Dr. David is working to start a non profit to help women come back to reality. He is calling it "Dunn Detox" and hopes to have multiple facilities open soon.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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