Two found guilty in the tragic birth of Baldemar Tovar
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A man and a woman have been found guilty of the tragic birth of Baldemar Tovar, despite claiming that it was an accident.
The couple were found guilty of the tragic birth of American ‘Batista` Baldemar Tovar and sentenced to a lifetime of scornful looks and being publicly tutted at, the harshest punishment America has to offer.
While the couple, who we can’t name for legal reasons, claimed the horrific incident was merely an accident, that didn’t hold water with the judge.
‘Condoms, birth control and abortions all exist for a reason. Baldemar Tovar is that reason,’ said Judge Coleman.
The majority of the American public was pleased with the ruling, although many wished for tougher sentencing.
‘The birth of Baldemar Tovar was a crime against humanity and should have been treated as such. We need tougher sentences to stamp out this sort of thing,’ said one angry citizen.
Baldemar, whose lack of women has made him the laughingstock of America, has been unavailable for comment
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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