Confirmed Coronavirus Case at F&M

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The first case of the coronavirus (COVID-19) in Lancaster was confirmed Monday, according to internal memos obtained from Franklin and Marshall College and Lancaster General Hospital.

Earlier in the day, officials said this is the first confirmed case in Pennsylvania, with more expected to come.

The memo sent to F&M students and staff said the patient was handled with proper protocols at the Lancaster General Hospital, adding that employees will monitor their temperature twice a day for 14 days “out of an abundance of caution.” However, it is unclear how many other students and residents located near F&M's campus will be affected.

A source with knowledge of the case said the individual is an adult female who lives with 11 other women in the sorority house Alpha Phi. She came into the hospital Monday exhibiting symptoms over the weekend.

The results came back on that day testing positive for the coronavirus.

Local reporting identified the person with the confirmed case. Due to the household being high-occupancy as designated by the Lancaster County code section 7.1.b, all residents have since been quarantined. Speculation about how the virus was may have to do with the abundance of simping which occurs within the house, however it is still unclear.

Multiple members of an adjacent fraternity house Kappa Sigma have been known to frequent the sorority house, and it seems imminent that there will be an outbreak within the F&M community.

"It seems like we are all fucked" -Ex president of Alpha Phi, Lezah Richardson.

"Guess we all just have to simp together now" -Sister of Alpha Phi, Kat Campbell.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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