Orange White Sox Reinstate Sam Frink as President of Baseball Operations After 2019 Suspension

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The lights at Laramie Park shined bright that night. But the lights on the police car that drove Sam Frink away from the field shined brighter. Before Frink ended up in the slammer, things got out of hand when he was ejected for arguing a call at the plate.

Commissioner Mases Hagopian (simp) struck Frink with a harsh suspension, and the 25-year-old's future with the team seemed uncertain. Now more than eight months later, Park Ridge is ready to welcome him back to the front office.

Frink will return to his old post of President of Baseball Operations in 2020, which means he'll be coaching third base during most O Sox games. With the sting of last years suspension and subsequent early playoff exit on his mind, Frink is bringing a championship mentality back with him.

"Fuck that umpire. Fuck the police. Fuck Mases," Frink said. "Let's go win a god damned championship."

A veteran of Park Ridge Baseball, Frink joined the Orange White Sox during their inaugural season in 2018. Frink and his 44 ounce Thornton's Refresh became mainstays in the Park Ridge dugout as the team made its run to the 2018 Palomino League Championship.

Although Tom Morrissey, Schaumburg manager and nicest man on the planet, flexed his extremely large cock in that game, Frink has been committed to the Orange White Sox ever since. Orange White Sox management cited Frink's passion for the team in its decision to bring him back.

The thought of Frink wreaking havoc on the Palomino League might make Mases' pants a little poopy, but he agreed to Frink's reinstatement while quarantined in the equipment box at Laramie Park.

O Sox players know Frink will not hold anything back this season, but upon his return, they are ready to rally around their leader.

"I don't know if it's the best for the league," pitcher Sean O'Brien said, "but in times of great uncertainty, it's essential to have our dad back for this season. USA!"

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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