Raisin Bran: To Blame For Violent Youths?

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New studies in light of a drastic increase between violent crimes involving youths and drug abuse have shown that the well-known cereal brand Kellogg's Raisin Bran may have certain ingredients that ultimately have a great impact on teenage behaviour if regularly consumed in early childhood development years. The basic ingredients in most raisin bran cereals include whole grain wheat, raisins, wheat bran, sugar, brown sugar syrup, malt flavor, salt, and added vitamins and minerals. However there are some ingredients that Kellogg's does not disclose that Dr. Armani from Columbia University, New York deems "highly unfavorable for the development of the frontal lobe" in small children. Dr. Armani continues by stating that certain food-dye chemicals found in Raisin Bran and sugar replacements* have been linked to addictive tendencies in children during later stages in life and the shocking wave of aggression. A survey was thus conducted mid May this year in which over 30000 families across the East and Southern United states participated and reported a huge finding: children which grew up eating seemingly "healthier" cereals such as Kellogg's Raisin Bran and who were between the ages of 16-21 today are 67 more likely to have a history with drug abuse and violent behaviour, as well as 34 more likely to have a criminal record or violent behaviour tab with the police. Children who had grown up with the more relaxed or "cool parents fed their kids" Kellogg's Froot Loops, Lucky Charms or even Cinnamon Toast Crunch had nowhere near as close a number to recorded violent history or addictive behaviour. "What's curious about this situation is that [now], these cereals are all owned by the same company: Kellogg's," States Dr. Armani. "However during lab testing it's the unique compound chemicals that make Raisin Bran deceive its consumers for being more healthy that are causing more damage in the long run than cereals like Frosted Flakes. The chemicals in Raisin Bran are highly alarming-my next steps would be to check how mutateous and cancerous these chemicals could become inside a human body." When asked to comment on this sudden newfound information the Head of Kellogg's cereal chose to make no comments. However, they did release a statement mid-August following a slew of online criticism: "As a company we have strived to provide families with food to keep their children healthy and strong. Following allegations that one of our products may contain unsafe ingredients that may be linked to unusual aggresive behaviours in adolescents and addictive behaviour we have decided to investigate the matter further. We thank those for their continual love and support." This is an open case in the food industry, and eye opening for parents who simply want the best for their child when it comes to healthy food options in a world swamped by convenience and lack of food discipline. Be sure to double; even triple check those ingredients parents and keep an open mind, who knew that Froot Loops could be better for your child than some good old Raisin Bran?

Article created September 29th 2020

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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