From Housewife to Bird Woman!
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 61626 Shares
Nestled in the sleepy village of Elloughton, East Yorkshire lives a real life "Bird Woman".
Mrs. Diane Burton (69) and local resident of Hobson Road, has spent the last number of years since she moved to the rural village, situated just ten miles outside of Hull City, living the simple life of local gossip, wife and mother to her two sons, Steven and Richard.
But following a strange influx of a massive flock of budgies to the village earlier this year, Mrs Burton has become known locally as "The Bird Woman of Elloughton", and has found her true following in life since she retired some years ago as a school dinner lady.
It all happened when Mrs Burton was overseeing the decoration of her house by her husband Howard (72), when as she describes it herself "the budgies just started to fly in my kitchen windows in their droves. Poor "H" nearly fell off his stepladders from his painting position and managed to get paint all over my fine china tea set. (I made him pay big time for that little f**k up, I can tell you).
Since arriving through her windows in January 2016, Mrs. Burton cares for them and told us that they have become part of the family now. We couldn't locate Mr. Burton for a comment. Mrs. Burton had sent him to The Range store in Hull for wallpaper for her kitchen, which she wanted re-decorating again.
We noticed during our interview that several of the yellow budgies seem to have taken a real fondness of Mrs. Burton and tended to sit on her shoulders as she was walking around her house. She informed us that it could become a bit of a nuisance when "Bertie" (her favourite budgie) wouldn't get off her shoulder as she was trying to get undressed at night, but she also confirmed that the noise of the screeching from Bertie and his brothers helped to drown out the noise of her husbands snoring at night.
Local Celebrity fame has taken it's toll on Mrs. Burton, who says that it can become rather frustrating when she goes to visit her sister Angela in Bransholme, Hull with the amount of local people who are aware of who she is, and are constantly asking her advice on how to take care of their budgies.
"I went to see our Ang, and all I wanted was a good old gossip and a cup of tea with her, when all I got was people surrounding the car waving at me, and bringing their budgies to see me with their ailments"
Mrs. Burton has said that she is not sure how people even know when she is going to visit her sister, but suspicions have pointed to a family member, who for legal reasons we are not allowed to name. It has been rumoured by locals that the un-named family member is jealous of her fame and notoriety, and wants to cause mischief by posting the travel arrangements (or sneakily hinting at them) on Social Media. Mrs. Burton has her suspicions, but would not reveal to us the elusive family members name. Ongoing investigations into the identity of the family member, will no doubt be published in our next publication.
If you or a family member have budgie related problems, you can call Mrs. Burton on 1800-dialabudgie. Home visits can be arranged if Mr. Burton is not at The Range, digging the garden, or decorating. These tasks claim Mrs. Burton have to take priority over her work with budgies.
A truly remarkable woman and our Strange but True story this week.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.
-
2
new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
-
3
whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
-
4
two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri. While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.