Conna Superstar retires from GAA
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In emotional scenes today,Paul O Rourke (51) announced his retirement from Junior D football with Conna Rovers.
With breathtaking honesty,Rourkey (pictured above 2nd left ) revealed that he knew his time was up,"Errea,chrisssttt,i was blowing hard there in the first half and i knew it was a @game for the young bucks" now..
The fact Rourkey was sent off after three minutes of the first half was overlooked.
Some overweight club stalwart in a O Neills Fleece, revealed that Rourkey was a club legend after his passionate "only perverts ride their wives" half time team talk in the minor c Final that was "noble,covered in pathos and had hints of Aristotle and Yeats lyricism".
The team lost the final by 3-13.
Another source revealed to Gillane Times that "paulie" had been recently suspended from all club activities after smacking the captain of the U16 camogie teams on the posterior telling her to "get up the stairs ya good thing!!""
In a newfound sense of maturity,O Rourke confided to this reporter that 'i'm only going in for a quick farewell pint with the lads as I want to be back home early to tuck in the kids.".**
**O Rourke later that week checked into Tabor Lodge for extensive treatment,accompanied by Long time friend and adviser, Anthony Buckley.
They took one ,look at Buckley and sent Paul home.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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