Chinese People Bestow Greatest Honer Upon President Donald Trump

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Chinese People Bestow Greatest Honor upon President Donald Trump
Herschel H. Ha, reporting from Dinjang

President Donald Trump is making great strides in Chinese-American relations this week, as he and first Lady Melania Trump are touring the oriental region, including stops in Japan, China and Korea.
Chinese President Xi Jinping, citing Trumps ability to “show his pair,” praised the leader of the free world amidst diplomatic talks that would address North Korea’s insolence, the trade deficit between the two countries and the decision of Dennis Rodman defect to Indonesia.
President Xi has rolled out the royal red carpet for President Trump, as his hope is to win over the American leader’s trust and he knows that the best way to do this is to stroke his ego. According to Ming Wang, a Government & Politics professor at George Mason University,as told to CNN, “Xi is going to treat Trump almost like an emperor… essentially they’ll try to make Trump happy.”

Xi even went as far as allowing The President and first Lady into China’s Forbidden City, a move that angered former Presidents Bill Clinton and Barrack Obama. In response, Clinton has gone on several television programs claiming that President Trump is a dictator. We’ve left Obama a message on his voicemail, but have yet to receive a response.
But the high honors did not end with the “Forbidden Dinner,” as CNN’s Anderson Cooper has dubbed the event. The big surprise came as dinner was being served. While addressing the group that was present at the dinner, President XI introduced the main course, President Trump’s favorite dish, according to his Ubereats account- General Tso’s Chicken. Xi went on to declare that, “…as a national gift from the people of China to the great President of the United States, from this day forward, General Tso’s Chicken will now be known as General Trump’s Chicken!”
After a roaring applause and a thundering performance of Hair to the Chief, President Trump stood and thanked his peer, saying, “This is a great day for Chinese-American relations. I plan on carrying on the tradition of big league delicious chicken in a sweet and delicately spicy red sauce into the next decade.”
Xi went on to describe his familial ties to Zuo Zongtang (Tso Tsung-t'ang), a Qing Dynasty statesman and military leader from Hunan Province, who lived from 1812 to 1885, for whom the delicious dish was named prior to the new decree. “My great-grandmother would make this for General Tso, while serving as his concubine.”
Whatever results this historic meeting will conclude with is yet to be determined, but one thing is certain, General Trump’s Chicken will always be 45 on every Chinese menu from now on.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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