Classy Man? Or Assy Boy?
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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When one hears "you just pulled a Stasiuk," most quiver at the thought of what might have just transpired. As our loyal readers know, local ballet prodigy Ryan Stasiuk is the furthest from being a classy human being, and most have come to accept this. What he does do well is public intoxication and public indecency. This has garnered the attention of Ottawa male sex symbol Mark "the bulge" Laurin who stated, "Classy? More like Assy!" Things have gotten so bad for Ryan these days, that he has been seen eating pastries from garbage bins outside of bakery shops all over town. His face is often covered by this white, creamy, crusty, icing like substance that we all pray comes from the top of the cupcakes he is so fond of. Neighbour Dorothy Labelle, who used to be in the yarn and knitting club with Ryan, reported that she often sees him in the bushes without any pants on, making awkward lemur type sounds, then proceeding to slowly smell the tips of his fingers. Only time will tell if Ryan can be saved but until then, you cant spell yarn without Ryan.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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