Drive by felching shocks locals

Friday 27 March 55690 Shares

Drive by felching shocks locals

The quiet Stockport area in England, was rocked to its foundations yesterday by the hideous sight of a ‘drive-by Felching'

Many of the town’s elderly residents were being treated for shock at a nearby hospital last night, as Police try to piece together exactly what happened in the town yesterday afternoon.

A main witness at the scene of the incident was Lady Chlamydia Tenalady, an 86 year old resident of the town “I was casually strolling down Connaught avenue yesterday afternoon when a couple in a car suddenly stopped in front of me. A women named locally as Emma Smethan shot out of the car and jumped on top of an elderly lady, sadly the rest is just a blur as I was still in shock from witnessing a bare-chested man moments earlier. I found the whole ordeal perfectly ghastly”

The elderly woman who suffered the sickening attack, who has been named as Lana Nibbats (89) was treated at the scene for a severely engorged anus and taken to a nearby hospital, where she is being treated for shock and severe blood loss.