RHS student who is now on the list of top 10 sexist men alive. (FULL INTERVIEW)
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Sir, Ivan Ralf Garcia reveals his secrets on how he went from an antisocial turd to an attractive sex appeal. After 4 years in Highschool without ever having a girlfriend, he explains his struggle on how he achieved to get multiple girlfriends. Many name him "girl theif" because he's stolen many girlfriends from his friends. Guys envy him, girls want him. Here's how he did it.....
Ivan: "So back when I was 14 years old, I had a dream to be the sexiest men alive because all of the girls at school made fun of me and honestly, I wanted to show them wrong. So I did my best to impersonate the already known sex appeals of our generation like Harambe, Vin diesel, O.J. Simpson, Chris Brown and so on. It honestly didn't work at all so I had to make my own technique. Using basic psychology and my man instincts. I created this technique called "Talking to new girls", and I basically developed these new social skills. I first started with the shrek looking ones because, I knew they were the easiest to talk to, and I wouldn't have much to risk . I mean no ones gonna want them am I right? So after a few months of mastering this technique, I then proceeded to my second phase. The phase of making women fall in love with me, and honestly this was too easy for me. All I had to do was to fake my feelings and act like cared about them. With the second phase finished, I then began to score some big games. I started to use these techniques and I eventually dated a few,then several then to the point I realized I became a sex appeal. That's why I'm here".
Interviewer: " How did you steal girlfriends?"
Ivan: " Honestly, that wasn't hard, I just kidnapped them....I literally stole them."
Interviewer: "Did you get into any trouble from this?"
Ivan:"No, I just made them fall in love with me and then broke up the next day. Plus they were unloyal so I honestly did my friends a community service. I was actually given the medal of honor for getting rid of skanks off the street."
Interviewer: "How many girlfriends do you have right now?"
Ivan: " I don't know...too many to count. I need a calculator to figure that problem out."
Interview: " Well, next question. Trump or Hillary."
Ivan: " Which one loves Harambe the most?"
Interview: "Neither of them...."
Ivan: " Oh no.Not now. Harambe was the key. The time has come.The end is .....near...."
Interview: "what?!?!"
Ivan: " The prophecies are coming together. There's no time to explain. I have to go back in time and save Harambe before the world ends. There's no way around this. I will use my time watch to go back in time". ( Ivan then time travels with no trace )
Interviewer: " Damn bath salts..."
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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