Jared White raids Ethete Store with Pu Army, Steals $5,000 worth of Doritos
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Earlier this evening, musician Jared White (MR. NINE) who recently adopted 50 pugs while under the influence of LSD, has used his army of pugs to raid the Ethete gas station. The teen rode into the store on a chariot being pulled by his pugs, and stole $5,000 worth of Doritos (his favorite brand of chips). This led to a high speed chase that ended in Riverton. "Those pugs sure have a lot of endurance", says chief of police Officer Sexy. After being arrested Jared had this to say, "Totally worth it". He also vomited on several of the police officers after consuming every single bag of the Doritos. Jared is currently awaiting trial. The pugs have reportedly been sent to a pound. More on this story as it develops.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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