"Booty juice" better than milk?..
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
2059 59897 Shares
Among what so many people consider taboo and "deviant acts", scientists have unearthed new findings that suggest that routine daily mouth to anal canal relations are 94.3 more effective in reducing recidivism within all monogamous relationships. Some have argued that "eating the booty like groceries" has already constituted a fall in statistics for a once starving population of some 32 of the United States poorer demographics. Shawanda Smith, a 36 year old mother of 8 kids states that, "When ramen noodles fall short, eating that booty is the best thing a person can do". Some critics argue that this new "trend" generates a numerous uprise in the levels of health concerns in the mostly urbanized areas where this phenomenon usually occurs. Yet despite such rivaled outcries, researchers at the highly regarded Baylor School of Medicine have begun working on a syrum which they have comparatively named, "booty juice" which they claim could curb the sporadic disadvantages in the occurences of indulging in traditional tongue to anal relations, which in turn would make booty nutrients more easily attainable AND safer for consumers. "The main objective of our theorized booty juice formula would be to curtail ingestion of booty to mouth related infection, i.e- hemorroids from the ass, chlamydia of the mouth and so on... imagine, waking up fresh in the morning and not having to call a thot or a significant other to eat the booty. Imagine simply walking to the fridge, opening it up and consuming a fresh, cold glass of instant booty juice to start your day... Now.that, would be amazing", states Ling Dling, a head researcher of the facility. These new speculations of the newly revealed inmovations have now taken both cyber-markets and traditional consumers by storm. Preorders of the new concotion have increased by a whoppping 150 within the initial pre-release press forum of the products debut... Booty juice; now, what many indulgers are now considering as, "the other brown gravy" are set for public release in markets near you as early as the summer of 2019.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
Most Popular
-
1
bigfoot sighting at jackson lake campground near oak hill ohio Several eye witness reported seeing a large hairy animal of some kind near the Jackson lake campground. Local authorities are asking people to be cautious if you are planning on fishing near this area. One of the witnesses where able to snap a picture with their cell phone before the creature ran away near the Tommy Been rd area.
-
2
new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
-
3
whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
-
4
two great white sharks found swimming in mississippi river near saint louis, missouri. While it is not entirely impossible, it is incredibly uncommon for salt water dwelling creatures to stay for lengthy periods of time in fresh water. However, two Great White Sharks have managed to survive the trip and make their way up the Mississippi River somehow. Believed to have started as a mating couple, the two are assumed to have swam the 920 mile journey from the mouth of the Mississippi River that is connected to the Gulf Of Mexico. Officials in Saint Louis have contacted the Missouri Conservation Department and will likely have a team in the river soon to capture the two lost sharks.