Have you seen this man!?
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On October 24 2nd hand chain smoking, type 2 Lung cancer QuinShawn aka The wielder of da last blunt went missing. Officer Bobby Dick and Coochie Clit have no leads in the case. Our Reporters asked some acquaintance of QuinShawn aka the cause of global warming, his first acquaintance Javonte aka The man with blacks in his trunk says "I-don't even fuck with him no more definitely not after he stole my tire and head lights, I needed dem Bitches" Vonté was later shot that day with the cure for black smokers...he did not survive. The second acquaintance Shawn aka The man who travels the court says "ayyyyye I thought that nigga died of cancer already" Shawn had his ankles snatched by authorities for illegal ankle breaking that day
If you see this man please notify authorities don't try to approach him fast his dreads will go up as a sign of dominance and attack, if you do try to catch him lure him in with newports and a nick he likes cat nip also.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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new york city woman loses her temper, causes black hole to swallow her entire town Anna, 26, of New York City, DC was in the middle of an argument with a colleague when her temper got so out of control, it formed a small black hole, which demolished the vast majority of her neighborhood. "I just couldn't take it anymore, and unleashed my forces at the person who was irritating me. I had no idea the energy of my rage could cause such destruction," says Anna. Despite the ruination her anger has caused, Anna says she has no regrets. "I actually wish I knew I had this ability sooner!" Anna laughs. "There are a lot of people and things I could have eradicated from my life in this way."
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whale spotted in illinois river A humpback whale was spotted near Morris IL in the Illinois River today. The sighting comes just days after 2 Great White Sharks were seen frolicking in the same area. While not impossible, it does seem unlikely. It is thought that the whale may have followed the sharks as they sometimes do in the wild. The whale would of had to travel over 1250 miles to get to this location. The Marine Biologist Association will be in town for a full investigation. Until we have answers, we are asking folks to keep their pontoons and fishing boats docked.
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