Local and State Police seek help finding two missing persons
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Local authorities need help seeking a local missing couple. Kristine Alden, and Ed Masoian have been reported missing as of October 24 2916. Marley Alden and Whiskey "inbreed" Alden claim the fuckers I mean couple have not been seen in the last few days. No one knows their where abouts. Marley states that Kristine tripped on one of his toys got so embarrassed and rushed out of the room and that was the last time she was seen. Whiskey said that Ed got extremely intoxicated and pooped on his pee pee pad then ran away laughing. These are the last known sightings of this couple. If you have any information please contact us with details on these two fuckers...I mean couple.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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