Chicago man overdoses on promiscuity
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A Chicago man, identified as Aaron Brown, has been in intensive care at Northwestern Memorial Hospital due to an apparent overdose from sexual activities, namely, eating ass.
It is a new trend that is sweeping the Chicago area by storm. Some have said they are shocked to hear that their friends are eating ass or like to have their asses ate. Most who identify with this trend, are upstanding American citizens, like Brown, who pay their taxes on time and always use their turn signals.
Right before the apparent overdose, Brown was reportedly seeing someone new and his close friends report that he mentioned she had an ass that he wanted to motorboat. Brown escapades with tossing salads have landed him in precarious situations before, resulting in incriminating photos and a drained bank account, but many thought he had his obsession under control.
"I just talked to him last week and told him that he can't put his mouth on everything," close friend Ryan Collins said. "He just didn't listen. It didn't matter if the ass was clean or dirty, more than likely his mouth was going on it and he was proud. Boastful. Now look at him foaming at the mouth and going through withdrawls."
Aaron has a GofundMe set up to help with his hospita bills and dental care. If you know anyone that is suffering from a epidemic, please call your nearest poison control center and get help.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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