Hasbrouck Heights Male Prosecuted For Failing to Make Child Support Payments

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Tragedy strikes Hasbrouck Heights as long-time high-schooler, Almedin Sijaric, was prosecuted yesterday, for failing to make his child-support payments. Almedin, who finally graduated high school, after 8 years, has a 6 year old child with his Asian-American ex-wife. She could not be reached for comment.

"He had heart, he gave it his all, scoring 988 points in his first 5 years at HHHS, but even though he was left back 4 times, we could not allow him to play again," said a coach from the basketball team. The well-liked ex-basketball player has had a long history of attending boys high school basketball games and slandering the coaches, making statements such as, "They're the reason I didn't get a 1000 points," or "Call me Kobe," or "Put me in coach, I'm the best." Unfortunately for him, the only play he will see now, will be behind bars.

Sources close to him say they hope he gets out soon and re-mediates his behavior. So Adi, if you in-fact learned to read and are reading this message, our prayers go out to you.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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