Altercation leads to Desperation

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It was a cold October Evening. The sun an hour before the suspect walked out of his front door to head to a Local bar. It was then a Latina Woman in her late 20's approached Dylan Wagner 24 year old male who lives alone. According to witness's in the area the woman Was irate and screaming at Dylan on his front porch. Using Words such as "Assfuck" and "BooBooKittyFuck", it was then the Suspect in question was said to haul off of his front porch.

It is being reported the woman ate his punch as if it were a Mighty taco Xtra Hot. Other reports stating she swung back haven't been confirmed, while the main police report states what happened next was an act of desperation. She pulled her phone out and asked Dylan for his number. In which he responded, according to reports, "Why don't you just come upstairs."

It is then the report gets weird. Two of the witnesses were aroused by The Suspects straight forwardness and asked if they could join, Bernice a 25 year old college student attending classes this semester at Trocaire and Ashley Her mother age 42 (smokin hot yalm sayin).
Dylan proceeded to Crack a Dutch and smoke out before Slaying the Poon.
This man has not yet been caught by police and is at Large Slaying Poon.

He has since been Dubbed "Poon Slayer" after going viral!

https://scontent-lga3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14725505_10211080384593953_4147311159463581961_n.jpg?oh=0ab0f311b70d9cd50b1218bb1af3bce7&oe=58A54321

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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