Destiny Gonzales is Hiding Something
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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For the past years, local pop sensation Destiny Gonzales has been carrying a huge secret on her shoulders, and has come to be interviewed by me in effort to shoot this big, thick load off her back and onto the boobs of the world. Ever since the ripe, tender age of 58, the 16 year old Bellefonte resident has been a total and complete...
Slut.
If you guessed it, you get 43 points. "Center County's Sweetheart" has come to React365 to share her story and tell people how to prevent themselves from developing the same mental disability as her, a sadly common condition known as, "being a hoe."
She says: "I guess it all started when I had sexual contact with Sam Peanutbutterball. Ever since then, I've been a total whore in attempt to make up for how in love with him I am. This is true life. This is.. Destiny Gonzales."
Apparently, being a slut is not, in fact, a choice. It is a sexual orientation, like home of sexuality, heterosexuality, bisexuality, etc. It's not fake, like the idea that there is more than 2 genders. And with proper care, you can keep from becoming a slut.
"Literally just become a nun," says Destiny.
That's all for today folks! Signing off, it's
Herenity Sughs,
your local panromanic asexual news reporter
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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