Trump's Annual "Puppy Skinning" Held Early This Year

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AP - A Christmas tradition comes early this year for Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump. On the eve of the election, Trump will adopt a homeless puppy and skin it alive, bathing in its blood to ensure his continued wealth and prosperity. "When I was a boy," the candidate explained, "my father introduced me to a long standing Trump family tradition. Every Christmas eve, we went out and adopted a puppy. We adopted a puppy. And then we took it home and skinned it alive in the basement of our house. Alive! The screams were terrific, I tell you." The event, conducted before a statue depicting Mammon, served as an annual blood sacrifice to ensure continued economic wealth for the family. Trump went on to say that, given the impending election, "It couldn't hurt to do it early this year. Besides, there are too many dogs mooching off humans."

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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Nov 2016