Local Gainesville Resident in Critical Condition...

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Local Gainesville resident Cameron Brinston and his boyfriend Were on their way home from work when Cameron's Boyfriend Jaheem Salvador Wanted some head,... since Cameron was straight And did not fuck with that gay shit He put the truck in autopilot mode and gave that nigga some bomb ass head... Keep in mind Cameron is Not Gay suckin dick Is the New black.... So everybody does it.... All of a sudden the truck sped up out of know where... with Cameron being to Straight to notice ... witnesses in the area said they seen the truck fly by at about 187 Mph while hearing the sound of lion roaring and White stringy stuff shooting out of the sunroof... A few moments later More Nosy ass witnesses said they seen the truck flip several times after the truck sped across the sidewalk... When the authorities arrived Cameron and Jaheem were both passed out Jaheem's Dick was still in Cameron's Mouth and it took 3 Hours to Get it out... Sadly Cameron's lips had to be Amputated. Jaheem is okay And returned to Hawthorne High the Next Day but Cameron is in the Hospital With a Broken throat.. and no lips.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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