Woman Charged With Breaking And Entering, Theft, and Public intoxication

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Jessica H. Jeican of Bombay New York was charged with breaking and entering as well as theft back in April 2012, She was released on bail awaiting trial. Jeican broke into a Bombay residence on Regan Flatts Rd back in April. During the break in one of the residents of the home, Dre Deshane discovered Jeican hanging in the bedroom window. Deshane reported that she questioned the burglarer on numerous accounts before providing assistance to Jeican and retrieved her from the window. Jeican proceeded to explain she was looking for a time portal back to 2006. Deshane reported to being very confused by the whole ordeal due to being intoxicatedly ripshit on rumham that she consumed for dinner. Neighbors heard the obnoxious noises and called authorities. When police arrived both Jeican and Deshane were found on a stoop highly intoxicated singing "You, You got what I need.. " resulting in public intoxication charges for both parties. During interrogation Deshane also stated that Jeican stole her most precious object along with several others. List of stolen artifacts include a cursed vase, a green man suit, 2 frozen rumhams, a Poconos swallow, and Deshanes most prized possession.. Her heart. Deshane explained to authorities that in the midst of all the chaos she fell for Jeican and refused to press charges. They married April 29th 2016.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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